My story ideas sometimes come from news topics, events in my life, and from random conversations. This topic came from a discussion with my husband about my four–year–old grandson Jack. He is smart, verbal, funny and also determined. The stubbornness is a familial trait. Both great grandpas were intractable, his father was stubborn and admittedly so was I.
Being a witness to this personality trait in my son and me. I wondered if both of us Taurus, the bulls, led to adult persistence. Jack is also a bull. After doing research, I found that having a stubborn child can lead to becoming a successful adult.
Stubbornness
Having or showing dogged determination not to change one’s attitude or position on something. This feels like bulldozing.
Persistence
Continuing in a course of action despite difficulty or opposition. Persistence is often found in those who are stubborn, but are backed by enough experience that they now know when any avenue has been exhausted. At that point, they will try alternate solutions. Persistence implies agility.
Meanwhile, how do I deal with my stubborn child?
Meanwhile, how do I deal with my stubborn child?
- Listen to your kid
- See your child
- Allos mistakes
- own up to your mistakes
- Invest in your relationship
- Avoid power struggles
- Make firm limits when necessary
- Explain how to compromise
- Give age-appropriate choices and independence
Positive Traits of Stubbornness
Determination –they will get what they need
Independence- they choose to do it on their own, which can lead to self–confidence
Leadership–strong will kids often trust their instinct and are not intimidated
Opinionated- they have no problem sharing what they think. As they grow older, this can draw attention to other points of view and pick their battles better.
Research on Stubborn Children
A study evaluating children between 8-12 years of age, then reevaluated this group of 700. Forty years later, they found the child who is a rule breaker and defiant of parental authority was a predictor of a high–income adult. To analyze this, psychologists looked at non- cognitive personality traits such as academic conscientiousness, entitlement, and defiance.
Persistence
To be persistent, you don’t give up when you fail. Once the goal is set, you will keep working until you succeed. When you recognize that feeling, you can continue to achieve. Your achievement becomes a vital experience and helps you to be consistent in your pursuits.. An advantage is you understand what your weaknesses are. When you know this, you can focus on your strengths. Other defining traits are: energy, imagination, resilience, good judgement and focus on a goal.
Example of Persistence
As I stated earlier, I was a stubborn child. I remember one day when I was around 7 years old, my mom came down to the street to have me come upstairs. Apparently, I wasn’t ready, and I started running away. My mom chased me four blocks until she caught me. Even though I knew there would be consequences, getting my way was more important. My mom dragged me upstairs by my hair, but that did not stop me from further defiance.
In adulthood my stubborn streak had blossomed into persistence. An example of this is my blog. I make no money or notoriety, yet I persist in writing articles. I had to learn how to work on a website and continue to strengthen my skills. No one monitors me, so I can quit at any time. The goal of creating a blog and sharing it with others is what I aim to accomplish. My perseverance and motivation pushes me to remain writing whatthehellonline.com
Conclusion
Although you may struggle with a stubborn child, the good news is this challenging trait can lead to a successful adult. Take note of the suggestions given and rather than fighting, learn how to cultivate this stubbornness. Who knows, this tough to raise kid might end up supporting you in your old age. To this, I say WTH.
